Co-regulate (calm down and feel safer) with a partner! Learn what you can say and how you can say it that will help you and your partner feel calmer and able to talk about difficult topics.
Learn strategies that help your attachment system.

If you have any disorganized or fearful avoidant attachment style in your mix, you’ve likely wondered why people and life events can seem to throw you off balance. You go to a party or event, and someone says just the right words to set off your personal inner critic…

Is it better to work on your attachment system by learning and thinking about attachment, and taking practical steps to change your behavior (a top down approach), or by accessing the felt sense/working with body sensations, working on calming the nervous system, and feeling what secure feels like in your body (a bottom up approach)?

Stress that stems from relationships is one of the biggest challenges that people face having an attachment adaptation. Since it is rarely possible to remove ourselves from all relationships — lots of downsides to that one, as you can imagine — it is more practical to work on our attachment system and learn ways to feel calmer in relationship.